Future Forgotten Photos

"Hey!" cries a voice blending with the sounds of the winds crossing the Playa.

"Hey," it becomes more clear as the source gets closer. A beautiful Emerald woman and monkey of a man in little more than blue bootie-shorts and a silver top-hat wave enthusiastically beckoning you to come over. You can’t resist.

"Do you want your Future Forgotten Photo taken?"

"What’s tha–" You stop, realizing you don’t need to know the answer to your own question. "I’d love one!"

The pair light up and launch into an explanation of what is to come next. They work like carnival game operators in complete unison, one speaking, the other enacting the words like a flight attendant showing how to use in-flight oxygen before take-off.

"All right, this is how it works" begins the camera touting gentleman taking a deep breath before launching into a well-rehearsed pitch. "You’re going to reach in this bag (assistant presents bag), pick out a clue, write your physical address on the back, enact it as best you can while I take your picture, forget about it, and I’ll mail it to you after we’ve both forgotten about it. Of course, the better job you do, the more likely I am going to be able to match your photo to your clue, and the more likely you will receive your picture in the mail at a later date. Got it? Great! What’s your clue?"

I asked 38 people, of which 36 agreed to have their picture taken. And, some months later, I developed my film from Burning Man and sat down to match clues to pictures. The photos have been mailed out (hopefully to their proper recipients… estimates put it at 29 of 36 correct), and now there here to share with you. Enjoy.

Removing Nipple Pasties

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Tongue Piercing

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About to Sneeze

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Meditation

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Being Born

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Betrayal

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3rd Grade Crush

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Champions

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Cold Water on Your Back

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Burning Man Greeter

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Deflated Air Mattress

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Jealousy

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Exhibitionist

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Vegetarian - Just Ate Meat

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Cotton-Mouth

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Fucking on the Playa

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It's Your Birthday!

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First Orgasm

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BLM Ranger

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Lost on the Playa

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Too Many Mushrooms

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Love at First Sight

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Christmas Morning

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Sexy

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Peeking (Neptune) &
Missed the Burn

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Passed Out

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Post-Shot, No Chaser

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Rolling

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Seeing Baby Animals

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Lust

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Sleezy Creeper

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Sunburnt

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Voyeur

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Deer in the Headlights

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Walked in on in the Port-a-Potty

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After over five months on the road packing becomes methodical. Now, for me at least, there are two primary types of packing: short term and full unpacked. I just completed the full unpack, meaning: I stayed here, in Utila, Honduras, to justify completely unpacking my bag. This may be the most mundane update I have ever cared to describe, but I’ll take you through the process:

1)  Put on music (a must; currently the new Dawes album)

2)    Scour room and place everything in a designated spot (best located near a wireless connection if there is one, a bed is an excellent option) tossing items into groups helping you to determine what you still have

3)    Unpack any items still clinging to a spot inside the bag and place them into the pile as well

4)    Look around room one more time, sift through piles trying to take a mental inventory- take note of anything missing and hope to find it later

5)    Sort (it’s more a constant job that I can’t help but do all the time). Try to find the items you use the least.

6)    Place all items into bag. Here’s how that shapes up for me in my currently:

1. All weather pants folded in half across the waist and in thirds. Place at bottom of bag flat
2. Slide sleeping bag in lengthwise so that it reaches the pants without getting caught on the inner zippers of the backpack. Rotate 90-degrees and cram down as much as possible.
3. Individually roll, and, in order, pack between the sleeping bag and back of bag the following: multicolored Bolivian cloth pants, secondary long-sleeve shirt, and rain gear.
4. Fold blue fuzzy Patagonia Synchilla zip-up jacket, and place flat on top of sleeping bag. Tuck edges of jacket around everything beneath it.
5. Roll shirts, shorts, and underwear as small as possible, pack against each other on top of jeans.
6. Jam in socks
7. Squeeze in belt somewhere
8. Fold collared shirt neatly and place on top of pile
9. Check to see what is remaining. Begin placing things where they belong in the backpack. Two head-lamps in the camping pouch? Check. Power cables? Check. Zip off pant legs? 2? Check.
10. Place toiletries on top of pile inside of bag
11. Flatten shoes and put them next to toiletries
12. Close up the bag attaching all straps
13. Final check of room
14. Attach pink bandana to outside zippers as a moderate deterrent to bag entry
15. Cover bag with rainfly

Going through the process you notice what you’re missing, and how desperately low you are on things (floss, non-fluoride toothpaste, shampoo, underwear, socks, eye drops, bandaids, Tiger Balm, sunscreen) and debate how long you can go with what you have. You still have your day bag to prepare, and need to get up at 5:30am to make a day-long journey onward.

Rhoto V: Fake Tears, Real Joy

Dear Rhoto V,

This is not the first time I’ve written you a letter of gratitude. I have been a user and advocate of your products since I first used them in 2006. I’m excited to say that recently, I have noticed an increase in the number of my peers using your eye-drops– those whom I introduced to Rhotos and those who discovered them independently.

In addition to allowing friends to sample my supply or Rhotos, each of the past two years, I have distributed your eye drops at the Burning Man festival as gifts. Because brand names are forbidden at this festival, I have painted the outside of the egg-shaped containers gold prompting many questions as to what I’m inviting people to put into their eyes. It provides me the perfect excuse to praise Rhotos and tell the story of how I fell in love with your product. Then, I hit them with my favorite marketing technique, which I would like to share with you.

To show the effectiveness of your drops, I invite first-time users to participate in the “Rhoto’s Challenge” and place a drop in just one of their eyes. In a matter of minutes, the difference becomes clear. One eye is white and wide open, while the other remains a puffy, dry, mess. As if feeling the difference weren’t enough, I take a picture and show them. To a T, everyone is sold.

I propose to you that the “Rhoto’s Challenge” would be an effective marketing campaign at music festivals and other outdoor events worldwide. Invite people to try your product, take their picture pointing to the relieved eye, and post it Facebook and tag them for their friends to see! It’s instant testimonial and reaches out to new audiences while building your presence in the ever-important social media world!

If you would like any more information about how I would envision the campaign please feel free to contact me. I love your product, and am doing everything possible to spread the good word about it!

Best wishes,

@babybirdit

babybirdit@gmail.com